Determined to be a miracle

When my surgeon walked into my hospital room in September last year and told me I had six to nine months to live and to get Amy back from university I was furious. How dare she put a date on my life and tell me how to manage my family. So I’ve been proving her wrong ever since! 

Palliative community care nurses have discharged me as I clearly don’t require them yet. 6 mths ago the nurses and my GP rang me every couple of weeks. It’s a great feeling, I’ve proved to them all that I’m here to fight & I’m not going anywhere soon! 

Covid has also been ticked off. After two years of avoiding it I finally caught it in Italy. I was relieved to get it ticked off the list and the anti viral vaccination saw it off in days. Now I’m quadruple vaxxed and full of anti viral too, so hard as nails and out everywhere. 

There are some advantages to this whole journey….

I can park anywhere with my disabled badges, love abandoning the car outside The Grosvenor in town or on double yellows outside Clatterbridge, it’s like being royalty!

I get PIP payments to fund my lavish lifestyle (guess it covers my increase in gas and electricity bill!)

The hat comes off in queues, the best being at eurotunnel where the delays were 4 hours and I told Zac I was on my way home to get the covid anti viral in hospital and naturally we ended up on the next train.

But the best of all is that I get to walk past all those people queuing at Manchester airport security, get on one of those buggies and travel in style through the airport!

I’m available to rent out you just have to take me with you. I feel a trip to Alton Towers coming on!

The last few months have been a bit crazy, lots of chemo peppered with lovely trips to my house in italy, lots of lovely time with the kids and my forever faithfuls. Treatment has taken its toll to be fair, the chemo is harsh, makes the breast cancer chemo look like a walk in the park. It really knocks me off my feet, literally! It gives me blurry eyes, indigestion like no other, loss of sensation in my toes, exhaustion at times and lately has affected my hearing. I now have what sounds like a sound wave constantly buzzing through my head, affectionately known as tinnitus, constantly blocked ears like you are at altitude and the strangest whooshing sounds in my head when I bend down. All unfortunately irreversible. I look battered and bruised from injections, catheters and low platelets. My Halloween outfit is going to be easy! I am currently the bravest person I know. Anybody needing to man up, send them my way.

I can’t pretend I’m not shit scared. It’s like playing Russian Roulette. Scanxiety is real and with frequent scans there’s not much rest in between. I’ve just walked out of my consultants latest meeting however with a smile on my face.  They’ve been scanning extra bits of me for the last few weeks, I’m pretty much scanned from my head to my pinkies with suspected spread of cancer to my femur and spine. It’s been a tense few weeks waiting for results but I’ve done a happy dance today as the cancer has not spread and is just in my head and lung. My consultant and his team are amazing, I always feel there is a plan. So next up is more chemo followed by ablation of my tumour in my lung, basically they are going to microwave me!

As always all this is only possible with the amazing support of my family and friends so thank you all.